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Melrose Place
Episodes #184 & #185 / Season #6
Title: "Last Train to Baghdad" (Part I - #184)
Original Air Date: Monday, February 09, 1998 [Christine's House, New Mexico]
Christine tells Kyle she doesn't want to see him. "Go away Kyle," she says, "I look different now." Yeah, like a brunette Kimberly Shaw! She flees into the confines of her home with Kyle close behind. He spins her around to take a look at her face and his jaw drops. "You are different!" he gasps, even though it is the first time he's seen her without a helmet. He asks her how she could be alive. She answers that she never died, then adds that she almost did anyway. She explains that her face was a freak show, they didn't know if she'd ever be able to walk again, and that it would take years of facial reconstruction. She admits she had Nick lie to him, saying she was dead, because she wanted Kyle to go on with his life. That's how much she loved him. He says she's still beautiful, but she adds she's still dead inside. She mentions sending a letter to his wife in Boston expressing those exact words. I don't know about you, but now I feel the way Kyle looks... CONFUSED! If Taylor had this letter all the time, then why didn't she know more about who this Christine was? Didn't it seem like she knew nothing about this desert dynamo until a few weeks ago? Then I realize, this is another episode directed by Warren "Potsie" Weber, possibly explaining all the loose ends in the script. [Palm Springs, CA]
It's 1:00 am when Billy finally gets ahold of Sam in her hotel room. You know the honeymoon's over when the first words out of his mouth are, "Where have you been all night?" Not your customary greeting. He asks her if she's become a golf groupie too. Sam replies, "I'm just doing what Jeff wanted," neglecting to add that Jeff wanted her to grasp the shaft of his 3 wood... you know, be his caddie! Her explanation fails to appease the jealous spouse, so she slams the phone down, hanging up on Billy. Milliseconds later, there's a knock at Sam's door. Her eyes light up, her lips puff with anticipation, forming a big beautiful smile, and she runs to answer the door. Of course, it's Jeff Baylor, who's there to "apologize" for making a pass at her earlier (if you can remember all the way back to last week). She smiles again, then lunges forward, thrusting her tongue and making a hole in one herself. Jeff just stands there, figuring, apology accepted. Now before you say, "Oh brother! How Sam could turn from saint to slut in two weeks?," remember, this is Melrose Place we're watching. However, at this point, I'm really beginning to wonder if it might be more interesting flip channels and watch snow fall in Nagano instead. [Peter's Marina Condo]
Papa Sterling arrives, and conjures up another request for Lexi, causing her to once again run upstairs for a few minutes. Just enough time for Sterling to chew off Peter's head again. Lexi skips back down with the useless paperwork, only to find Papa Sterling already gone. She wonders if Peter said something to drive her Papa away. Peter tries to convince Lexi her father is mean, vindictive, and wants him out of her life. Lexi fails to understand this, saying her father loved Coop, as if he was a son-in-law. "He [Coop] wuved my fathah. He wuved my fathah." In other words, Peter's to blame. She tells Peter it is definitely his problem, and to fix it. [Burns-Ghost-Coop Medical Office]
Michael stops by to panhandle Peter out of $500, claiming it's for his mother. Peter writes Michael a check, hoping it'll get him out of his hair. Meanwhile, a new receptionist has been hired to sit at the desk in the main office space, since Megan has taken over Michael's recently vacated office. The placard on her door reads, "Megan Mancini - Office Manager." Coop arrives in time for Peter to give him an earful of [Santa Fe, New Mexico]
I'm sure glad for subtitles, otherwise, I would've figured this Spanish-looking building was located somewhere in say, Southern California? It turns out this is supposed to be the hotel where Kyle and Amanda are staying. Christine comes to see Kyle, but he's out on a jog so she meets Amanda instead. When Christine asks Amanda if she's an old friend of his, Amanda replies no, she's actually his fiancee. Christine admits she didn't handle seeing Kyle last night very well, adding "It reopened old wounds" (gross!) "I gotta see him again. God help me, I've got to put some kind of closure on this." Obviously, after taking one look at the gimp named Amanda, Christine must realize, "Damn, what's a little shrapnel in the face compared to that?" Amanda tells Christine, Kyle may not want to see her again, so Christine begs for Amanda to help. [Amanda Woodward Advertising]
Sam returns and she and Billy apologize. She shows him the changes she made to the campaign, incorporating Jeff Baylor's ideas. Billy fumes, basically because the entire concept has changed, and all his ideas are gone, leaving only Sam's contributions. The two rekindle their feud. [Halfway House Cafe]
I'm only guessing, but I think we're back in Santa Fe. In the dirt parking lot out front of this greasy spoon, there's a VW Cabriolet, bringing back cherished memories of Jane Mancini. Oh, those were the days. Oops, sorry, I digress. But speaking of memories, Kyle and Christine share some of their own over a couple cups of bug juice. Christine is rambling on about something or another, all the time Kyle stares blankly at her face. "I can't get over how different you look... you look good though" he finally utters. She tells him she had so many operations over the years, on her face and throat, and through some new sort of medical technique, the doctors were able to take all of the scar tissue, which would normally be found covering 80% of her body, and somehow collect, condense, and squish it such that it would only occupy a small area, approximately 2 square inches, just under her right ear. "How does this look?" she asks, as she lifts her hair up, in the same fashion Kimberly unveiled her scarred head, showing Kyle some sort of burn/scar mark. "Exactly like a creature on Star Trek: The Next Generation" I would've answered! Boy, I can hardly wait to see how this scar changes shape from week to week. She tells him she used to listen to the train roar by her window every evening while she was in the VA hospital, and how she used to dream about lying on the tracks and letting the Santa Fe Railway blast her to kingdom come. Then Kyle goes into his life story, so for those who haven't been watching for the past couple of seasons, watch this 20-second clip and you'll be all caught up. Kyle salutes her, then they clasp hands. [New Mexico Hotel Room]
Kyle returns to the hotel room, where Amanda is sitting around. He stares into the flame in the fireplace, invoking memories of Christine's Jeep exploding, kicking her body up and out of the TV picture. Amanda comments, "She's still in the room, isn't she?" Kyle leans over and tries to "do" Amanda right there on the couch, finally understanding the turn-on Coop used to get jumping his patients and invalids. [Amanda Woodward Advertising]
Billy and Sam are called into Amanda's office because of all of their recent squabbling. When Sam says dynamics developed between her and Jeff, Amanda has to cool Billy's jets by sending him out for the spreadsheets, even though that's probably what Sam and Jeff worked on most in the hotel bedroom. Amanda asks Sam to be her maid of honor, then looks at Sam's graphics and comments that Sam still needs Billy's expertise, so she tells Sam it's up to her to combine Jeff's ideas with Billy's advertising know-how... or was that, no-how? [Wilshire Memorial]
A home boy is in ER with a broken set of knuckles. Michael bandages the brother up. Homey plants a seed in Michael's soiled head to open up a practice in South Central L.A. You know, one of those businesses that can get burned to the ground the next time Rodney King decides to drive his Hyundai ninety in a school zone. Homey adds, "A smart doc could make a fortune in cash patients, if he had the right connections." [Upstairs Jazz Club]
Taylor asks Amanda for all the juicy details about Christine. Amanda informs Taylor there's nothing to tell, and she even invited Christine to the wedding, but she declined. Meanwhile, Jennifer's on pay phone, talking to her mama. She promises to bring Billy to dinner. Jennifer runs downstairs to Kyle's the Restaurant. [Kyle's the Restaurant]
What better place could two people lay out an entire advertising campaign, but at Kyle's the Restaurant, where the portions are so small that they take up very little space at the dinner table? Jennifer runs down and catches Billy, and asks if he'd impersonate Craig one last time. Billy refuses, so Jennifer falls to her knees, and seeing her in that position, makes me to wonder if there's been any late-breaking news about Monica Lewinsky. With Sam's coaxing, Billy agrees to help Jennifer out one last time. Sam says she'll go back to the office to work on the campaign changes. [Mira Mesa Hotel, Room 1720]
Peter goes to pay Tom Sterling a visit. Peter turns on his micro-cassette recorder and places it inside his jacket pocket, with the intention of taping Tom's behavior as proof to Lexi that her father is being unreasonable. "Doh!" Sterling grabs the back of his neck, and tumbles to the ground. [Beach House]
Mama Mia is having a fit because Craig isn't there yet, to help make the dinner. Then she asks Michael for the $500 he owes her for bailing him out last week. He starts to hand her the money, then suggests she invest it in the Mancini Medical Center. Mama agrees to listen to his sales pitch. She sticks what appears to be a long snot on the refrigerator, and says, "You have until this falls onto the floor to convince me." So Michael starts plugging when there's a knock at the door and Billy/Craig arrives. Jennifer receives him with a wet and juicy kiss. The noodle hits the floor, so Michael blows another long sticky one onto the refrig. Mama comments that Uncle Vinnie is looking for a place to put his pension fund, causing Jennifer to pull Michael aside to reprimand him for scamming his own mother. Michael hints that Jennifer isn't being so honest herself, pointing to her "fiance." [Amanda Woodward Advertising]
Ah, finally, someone working at night again, just like the good old days. Sam is busy at the drawing boards, when a stranger in jeans sneaks up and scares Sam. Of course, it's Jeff Baylor, who's becoming more irritating than a three day old wedgie. Don't even ask how he managed to make his way onto this floor of the security building, or how he knew that Sam would be working there all by herself. Anyway, he claims to be there to apologize for his recent behavior and suggests that it might be better if she deals with his manager rather than directly with him. [Wilshire Memorial]
Lexi races into the ER, where she sees Megan. Megan tries to explain Peter's trying to save Sterling from a stroke, and how Peter called Coop to find out about Tom Sterling's medical history. "My father doesn't have a medical history!" Lexi exclaims. Ah, but he does if you count his eight years on "Medical Center." Peter comes out with bad news. He couldn't save the old man. Lexi breaks down crying, and Peter and Coop vie for prime hugging positions on the nearby couch. Meanwhile, a nurse comes out with Peter's coat, the same one with the recorder, and hands it to Megan. She takes it and leaves. [Peter's Marina Condo]
The next morning, Peter finds Lexi sitting on the veranda. He asks if she's all right. She answers she doesn't know what to do. Peter tells her there's nothing to do but go on. Lexi replies, "And make funeral arrangements back in Cleveland, and notify the relatives, and the board of trustees." Yikes! This is more work than Lexi's ever done in her life. No wonder she's crying. Peter offers to fly back with her to help, but she says Coop already offered. Then she begs Peter to tell her what was going on between him and her father, and what they were talking about. Peter lies, saying he went there to get to know him better, and that her father wished Peter could love Lexi half as much as he did. Lexi thinks about having to go back to Cleveland, and starts crying again. [Burns-MIA-Coop Medical Office]
Coop enters Megan's new office digs to tell her he's off to Cleveland to attend Mr. Sterling's funeral. Megan asks, "Are you going with Lexi?" Coop answers, "He was her father." And hey, this IS Megan. What sort of questions do you expect from her? Coop leaves. Megan, just finishing listening to one of Coop's tapes, reaches over and knocks Peter's jacket to the floor, his microcassette player falling out as well as the tape that was in it. For once, her clumsiness pays off, for when she takes the tape and mistakenly puts it into her transcriber, she hears the recorded dispute between Sterling and Peter. Quickly, she switches the tape with one of the patient tapes laying on the desk. Peter enters, sees his jacket and asks Megan whether she listened to the tape in his pocket. She plays dumb, her best feature, and Peter takes his jacket and heads to his office, where he proceeds to destroy the tape by gripping it and actually tearing it in half! [Mancini Medical Center]
Michael takes Jennifer and Mama to the 'Hood, where the building he's planning on leasing is located. You'd think the broken windows and fire marks on the building would warn him about the sort of neighborhood he's in. Then a red T-bird with rap music pounding out the windows drives up. His former home-boy patient, Spider, steps out and welcomes Michael to the 'hood. Michael asks him why he's really there. Spider replies, "I want everyone in the neighborhood to see us shaking hands. That's good for you. That's good for me. Means we're in business." If I missed anything, it was because of the police helicopter flying overhead. [MP, Billy & Sam's Apt]
Sam, dressed in some sort of satin number, is willing and waiting for Billy to arrive home. She jumps Billy as soon as he enters, and the two go at it, window shades open wide. Meanwhile, in the courtyard, Mama Mia and Jennifer arrive home, voicing concerns over the location of Michael's new medical practice. Mama, who seems to enjoy watching her daughter tongue-lock "Craig" every chance she gets, peeps into Billy and Sam's apt window for some side action. But what she sees causes her blood to boil. She crashes through their door, assuming it's Craig kissing some other woman. She breaks them up and punches Billy in the stomach. Jennifer has to confess, explaining that Billy really belongs to Sam, and that Craig killed himself. Mama thinks it's so sweet that Jennifer cared enough to lie to her. [Upstairs Jazz Club]
Surprise! Guess who's coming to dinner? It's Christine. She decides that Kyle's wedding is such a big step for him, that she should come and support him. Taylor pops out to introduce herself. Then Amanda crawls out of the woodwork, and she, Christine, and Kyle sit down at a table. Amanda starts into her jealous act, rambling on about closure. Christine says to her, "If my being here makes you upsets you in any way, just tell me and I'll walk out of her right now." Kyle interjects, "No, no, no, of course not." Meanwhile, Taylor whispers something to Tuck & Patti, the entertainment for tonight, and moments later, over the loudspeaker, I assume it's Patti, who says, "We'd like to play a request. This one's for Kyle, and a walk down memory lane. You Take My Breath Away." A smile appears on Christine's war-torn face, and she comments, "I haven't heard this since before I became shell-shocked." Kyle looks at Amanda and swears he did not ask them to play this song. Christine continues to ramble, saying how amazing it is that Kyle finally got his jazz club. Then Christine asks Amanda's permission to dance with Kyle to the song. [To Be Continued...] Go to Part II of ìLast Train to Baghdadî |
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