Melrose Place
Episode #182 / Season #6
Title:  "Coop de Grace"
Original Air Date:  Monday, January 26, 1998

[MP, Kyle's Apt]
We start this episode as we did last week, with a quaint dream scene from Desert Storm. Boy, he's got to stop eating at Taco Bell. In this dream, Kyle and Christine share a bottle of fine wine in real wine glasses, making toasts to each other. Christine says Kyle's the first man she's ever really loved. Whether she's bi, we'll never know, because before Kyle can ask, he's rudely awakened by the ringing of his telephone. It's Mario, his chef, who begs for Kyle's help at the restaurant, noting that Taylor went out of town for a few days.

[Buffalo Chip Saloon]
By the name of the bar, you'd think this place was located in Upstate New York, but the sign hanging outside says Dallas, Texas. By the looks of both the outside and inside, I think the writers went a little overboard with the Wild West theme. C'mon, folks, this isn't the Gunsmoke days anymore. Even Texas is now civilized. The bar itself looks like it's the one in the Budweiser commercial where some onlookers learn why the chicken crossed the road. Taylor finds Nick stacking glasses behind the bar. She asks him about Christine. He tells her she wasted her money coming all the way out because there's nothing to tell. Then he kicks her out, saying if she ever returns, he'll smash her teeth into the back of her head. That is, if he can get past those airbag lips of hers. I don't know about you, but with lines like that, this Nick character is beginning to grow on me.

[Peter's Marina Condo]
Lexi makes her daddy, Thomas Sterling, breakfast on the veranda. She brings him a cup of hot coffee, saying, "Black and sweet, just like you take your women." Peter skips breakfast and leaves for work, at which point, Lexi's daddy asks her, "What are you doing with that Bozo?" Lexi answers, "Clowning around, of course, and having fun." Her daddy still doesn't understand why Lexi left Coop, even after Lexi reminds him Coop climbed into bed with one of his comatose patients. Understanding the urges of a doctor, having been one himself in a previous lifetime as Dr. Joe Gannon in "Medical Center," Mr. Sterling excuses Coop's behavior, saying men are stupid.

[Beach House]
Coop drives up and finds Amber struggling with a couple of suitcases. Apparently, she's moving into the beach house. Coop offers Michael an olive branch and a bottle of Summer's Eve, explaining he and Megan want to start their relationship over, fresh and clean. Michael begins to tell Coop where he can shove that olive branch, but when Amber looks at him, Michael stops and accepts Coop's peace offering. Coop mentions the party that Burns-Mancini-Coop is throwing for all the hospital bigwigs tomorrow night, and says he hopes to see Amber there. Coop leaves and Michael utters, "Sneak." Amber comments that she thinks Coop is nice. "That's what they said about Ted Bundy," Michael warns. Amber looks at him and tilts her head to-and-fro, perplexed as to why Michael has a thing against her favorite show, "Married With Children."

[Wilshire Memorial]
In the doctors' locker room, Peter tells Coop about the arrival of Tom Sterling, and what an S.O.B. he is. Coop informs Peter, Tom is a rich, rich man with a lot of power, and advises Peter to stay on Sterling's good side if he knows what's good for him. As Peter and Coop walk the hall, Coop voices his concern about how Michael will behave during the big party the practice is throwing tomorrow night. Again, he tries to convince Peter that Mancini should be removed from the practice, but Peter refuses to listen. Meanwhile, in another part of the hospital, we see that, sure enough, Amanda's two-episode facial lacerations are just about healed. Peter walks in and they inform him of the wedding, catching Peter by surprise. Amanda thanks Peter for making her realize that Kyle's the most important man in her life. Peter congratulates her, by leaning over to kiss her on the cheek, causing her to feel a sensation on the lower half of her body. She exclaims, "Oh my God! Peter, you made me tingle down there!" Peter grins, realizing he's still got the touch. "Quick. Stick a pin in my foot or something." Peter heads toward the foot of her bed, and trying to find something the size of a pin, reaches for his pants, whips something out and asks, "Can you feel this?" Amanda answers that it's not a sharp pain, but it is a sensation of pressure. Peter puts the ball-point pen back in his pocket and rushes to the phone, scheduling a suite of neurological tests for Amanda, as well as an operation for ink poisoning. Peter tells Kyle and Amanda it's a good sign. The two lovebirds hug each other, while Peter can only stand in the shadows and watch.

[MP, Courtyard]
Jennifer is on her way out the front gate, when she is approached by a dark figure in the shadows by the mailboxes. It's Dr. Mosley, who whispers that her company is in jeopardy and lives are at stake. He hints at a problem with the heart valve that Field/Mancini Enterprises is involved with. "I can't be connected to this... Follow the money" he says. Jennifer, as impatient and irritated by this as we are, replies, "Mosley, stop the Deep Throat act and spill." Which makes me wonder, is she referring to the Watergate Deep Throat of the 70's, or the Deep Throat of the 90's with Monica Lewinsky? Mosley informs Jennifer that Craig is quietly switching manufacturers, employing a cheaper plastic, in order to cut costs of some heart valve apparatus. Mosley hands Jennifer an envelope with all the supporting evidence.

[Dallas, TX]
Nick returns to his apt, only to find Taylor sitting and waiting for him in a chair. Looking around, it's apparent Nick was lucky enough to find a place about as sleazy as the dump he had while in Los Angeles. She tells Nick she paid his overdue rent, then asks about Christine again, figuring he now owes her a favor. Nick is sick of this question, so he tells Taylor, Christine is dead. Taylor curses when she hears this. She goes on to tell Nick how Amanda and Kyle are getting married, Kyle proposing out of some sick sense of guilt, explaining how Amanda's a physical mess after her helicopter accident. Taylor just wanted to find Kyle's one true love and get her to rattle Kyle's cage, making him realize the mistake he's making with Amanda. Nick responds with, "You're one sick broad that should be locked up before you ruin anymore lives!" Told you, you'd start liking Nick. Taylor asks Nick to tell her more about Christine. Nick looks at the camera as if to say, "This girl's driving me crazy!"

[Upstairs Jazz Club]
Ugh, how I miss Shooters! Billy and Sam are having drinks with a couple clients. One of them comments to Sam and Billy, "You two make quite a team. You're just the breath of fresh air Flash Sporting Goods needs to get back in the big leagues." Then the other opens his big mouth and adds that they've decided to go with a celebrity spokesman, a sports player named Jeff Baylor. Billy comments, "Tiger Woods of the minor leagues." Hmm, just the thing to keep them out of the big leagues. Billy says they'll try to get him, but if they can't, there are always other players, but the clients tell Billy they only want Baylor, so to call them when he's signed. The two clients leave, and Billy tells Sam, "We're so dead." Yeah, Billy, tell us something we don't know! Billy explains to Sam how the agency tried to sign Jeff Baylor in the past and blew it, how he hates endorsements, and that there's no way he'll sign with their agency. Billy asks Sam if she even knows who Jeff Baylor is, and Sam surprises him by rattling off Baylor's season stats from last year. Billy comments, "You never cease to amaze me," then kisses her, hoping he can get to first base with her tonight. Then Billy notices Sam's wedding ring is missing, and asks her about it. Sam tells him it fell in the garbage disposal, and now is in the shop getting the diamond remounted. Meanwhile, at the bar, Jennifer confronts Craig about his cost-cutting efforts regarding the heart valve. She can't believe he's doing this, and says if it were anyone else, she'd scream bloody murder. Craig chuckles, saying "Interesting way of putting it,  because, if you open your trap to anyone, I'll kill you." My question is, which "trap?"

[Dallas, TX]
Nick and Taylor wake up together in each other's arms. Nick can't believe he'd stoop to having sex with Taylor, apparently doing anything in his power to shut her up and keep her from asking about Christine again. As two people who wake up together normally do on Melrose Place, they talk about who they really love. Taylor talks about Kyle, and Nick talks about... Kyle. Taylor mentions the jazz club that Kyle opened with Amanda, causing Nick to take a sudden interest in their conversation. He's upset because opening a jazz club was a dream he and Kyle had always talked about doing together. Taylor adds that she owns part of the club and would be willing to share it with Nick if he helps her prove to Kyle how bad Amanda is for him. Again, she asks about Christine. Nick adds how Christine and Kyle shared a magical love he had never seen between two people. When Taylor asks if Christine died in battle, Nick replies, "No. She lived. For awhile." Nick stops short, causing Taylor to ask, "What aren't you telling me?" Nick refuses to answer, knowing he already betrayed the buddy who saved his life, by sleeping with his wife. He tells her to get out, saying "You've gotten all you're going to get out of me." Taylor puffs her lips in, as if one orgasm isn't enough, but hey, Nick's no young stud anymore. Once is his limit and he's dry. He knows it and leaves.

[Wilshire Memorial]
Peter runs into Coop and Lexi's daddy, waiting for an elevator. Tom Sterling smiles at Peter and says, "I didn't know Coop made you a partner in his firm. You just moved up a whole notch in my esteem." Tom comments to Coop about getting together to play tomorrow, and Peter, overhearing, asks if he's talking about golf. Tom replies, "Golf is for lazy men. I'm talking about tennis." Then he tells Coop to schedule some playing time at the club tomorrow, and not to forget to hire some ball boys to chase the ones that go into net. Later, Jennifer brings evidence to Coop proving Craig has gone off the deep end. In a terrible sound-dubbing, we here Coop say he'll take care of it later.

[Burns-Mancini-Coop Medical Party]
Practically the entire medical staff of Wilshire Memorial is here tonight, and Peter hopes that their practice makes a good impression on the crowd. Well, having a typo on the big sign at the entrance to the ballroom isn't the best way to impress, using the "it's" form rather than "its." Tsk! Tsk! The sign greeting the guests reads:

      BURNS/MANCINI & COOPER

         A Medical Corporation

WELCOMES IT'S HONORED GUESTS

As if the mistake in the sign isn't bad enough, Michael arrives with Amber, who's dressed as though modeling for the Victoria's Secret catalog. Megan spots Amber, as does every man in the room, and pulls her aside. Megan explains what she's learned since hanging up her crotchless-wear and joining the ranks of the prude. "The ideal is to impress, not titillate." Of course, Megan hasn't learned much herself, as she offers Amber the shawl she was wearing, a nice black sheer see-through number. The two rejoin the festivities. Coop offers Amber some champagne, but she declines, saying it goes to her head. Coop promises to keep an eye on her, so Amber, a la "Blind Date," starts gulping down the champagne as though it was Kool Aid. Of course, soon thereafter, she's doing a table dance. Michael tries to refrain her, and the two go crashing down onto the dessert tray. Coop, meanwhile, is true to his word as he stands there keeping an eye on her making a spectacle of herself.

[DFW Airport]
Nick shows up at the airport, where he finds Taylor sitting at a table at one of the airport restaurants waiting for her flight. He asks about the jazz club, and Taylor really lays it on thick. But she adds that Amanda has Kyle walking around like a castrated puppy. I don't know what that means exactly, except that he probably lost the urge to lift his leg. So Nick leans in close to Taylor and tells her that Christine didn't really die. He explains that the blast disfigured her face, and that she figured it would be better for Kyle if he thought she was dead instead of him caring for an invalid the rest of his life. He says she was transferred back to the States but covered her tracks. And even though he's hated himself every day since, he kept his promise to her and kept the truth from Kyle. I wouldn't be surprised if the next storyline will be a "Face Off" rip-off, Taylor switching faces with Christine so that she can reunite with Kyle, being the one true love of his life.

[St. Joseph's Charity Carnival, Pediatric AIDS Fund]
Billy and Sam hunt down Jeff Baylor, who's at the dunking booth. Billy tries to pitch his campaign offer while pitching balls at the target. Baylor isn't too interested in Billy's offer, saying he's there to raise money for a good cause, not to work out endorsement deals. Hey, you'd never find Tiger Woods doing this. Billy is about to strike out, but when Baylor sees Sam, Baylor quips, "If she can get me wet with your last ball, I'll listen to your sales pitch." Billy starts to drop his slacks, but Sam clears her throat, hinting that Baylor was referring to the baseball. She throws one pitch and nails the target, dunking Baylor. Sam strolls over to the edge of the water tank and hands the "wet" jock her business card, telling him to call her on Monday morning if the card doesn't become pulp from being in his wet pocket for the rest of the day. She adds, "In high school, they clocked my fastball at 67 mph. That's not bad for a girl, huh?"

[Beach House]
Michael is staring out at the sunset over the ocean, but knowing the production crew on this show, it's probably supposed to be sunrise! He tells Amber her little peep show at the party last night was the last nail in his coffin. He asks her what she was thinking, so she blames Michael for leaving her alone, Coop, and the champagne. Michael admits it was his fault, acknowledging, "Trash all dressed up, is still trash." This results in a face slap.

[Kyle's the Restaurant]
Peter and Coop call an emergency meeting, Coop citing the medical reception as a disaster. Megan arrives and is told the news, that Coop wants Michael out of the practice. She asks if Peter really wants this. Peter says he's going to wait to see what Michael has to say for himself. Even though Peter and Megan are fairly neutral, Michael enters as Coop is trying to make his case, and assumes that all three are against him. Before anyone can say anything, Michael says adios, but first he tosses a drink into Coop's face. It would've been more effective had he thrown the glass, too, not just the contents. Michael leaves. Coop tries to take Megan home but she leaves alone, saying the whole scene has left a bad taste in her mouth.

[MP, Jennifer's Apt]
Craig brings some flowers, as an apology, over for Jennifer. He tells her Coop fired him after finding out about the heart valve switch. He tells her he should've saved the flowers for her funeral, telling her he's ruined because of her. In a Melrosian attempt at dealing with important social issues, Craig tries to beat Jennifer to a pulp. The scene lasts about thirty seconds, before Billy runs in to save her. Only, Jennifer seemed to be doing a better job at fending Craig off than Billy does, as the boy wonder gets thrown to the floor. Craig finally runs out the door. Well, that's enough

[MP, Amanda's Apt]
Kyle wakes from another Christine-dream, calling out her name. One look at the sheets, and he realizes he's in Amanda's bed. Thinking quickly, which is hard for Kyle even when he's fully awake, he calls out, "Amanda." He finds she's out not in bed with him, but in the bathroom, where she managed to make it using her walker.

[MP, Jennifer's Apt]
Michael checks on Jennifer's bruises. The two of them talk about their Mancini woes.

[Kyle's the Restaurant]
Peter, Lexi, and Tom Sterling are enjoying dinner when Lexi's daddy breaks the news that Sterling/Conway Enterprises is opening a West Coast Division. What a coincidence, that it happens to be locating smack dab near Melrose Place! Despite her never having worked a day in her life, he tells her he wants her to run the place, if she's interested. She's so excited that she dips herself in her daddy's steak sauce. She leaves momentarily, giving Tom the opportunity to tell Peter he isn't the "sharpest knife in the drawer." Tom's plan is for Lexi to start working at a Fortune 500 company so that one day, she'll open her eyes and wondering what the hell she's doing, living with a guy like Peter Burns. I guess Peter didn't make the best first impression on the guy.

[MP, Jennifer's Apt]
Megan has a feeling Coop really was out to bring down Michael, citing his behavior leading up to Michael's demise. So, when Coop drops by to pick her up, she calls the date off, just like real dating. Wisely, she decides to save her "I'm washing my hair" excuse for some other time.

[Kyle's Office]
Kyle and Amanda finish a luvy-dovy conversation on the phone. Amanda, using her walker, then proceeds to fall onto the floor, which looked more painful than even the helicopter crash. She screams out for help. Eventually, of all people, Taylor comes to her rescue, picking Amanda up using a full nelson. Amanda asks Taylor to keep this incident a secret. Taylor agrees, and since they're on the topic of secrets, tells Amanda she's got a good one about a girl named Christine.

[MP Courtyard]
Jennifer is on her way out to her car, when she is approached from behind by a man with a gun. He demands her car keys. When she feels that all-too-familiar long hard rod pressing against her backside, she says, "Craig, is that you?" It is, and since Coop repossessed his car, he's taking the one he gave Jennifer back. She tries to give him a pep talk, but he starts quoting Sydney, saying "You're all a bunch of emotional vampires." He leaves, saying "Goodbye, Jennifer."

[Beach House]
Michael arrives home, calling for Amber, but there's no answer. He sits down to watch TV, but realizes it's not there. The VCR is missing, too, as well as the microwave and, heaven forbid, the cappuccino maker. Michael realizes Amber moved out, and took his stuff rather than hers.

[Empty Beach Parking Lot]
Craig parks the car along a lonely strip of pavement near the ocean. "I couldn't do it, Sydney. I couldn't do it without you. I screwed up everything. And I miss you so much. I just want to hold you again. I just want to be with you again." With that, he looks over at the passenger seat, eyeing the handgun. He brings it to his head and pulls the trigger, committing suicide and damning his soul to hell for eternity. What a dummy, what if she went to heaven instead? So, now that Craig's written off the show, won't he be in for a surprise when he finds out Laura Leighton is already in Doug Savant's arms! And won't Nick be happy. Now there's an apartment available back in the complex, and not a moment too soon!

[To Be Continued...]

Last Updated January 27, 1998