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[Peter's Marina Condo]
Peter approaches Lexi, who appears to be reading the Bible. Peter says (the actor, not the Disciple) to her, "Take my hand and I will lead you to the path of righteousness, away from her drug habit." He confesses that he peeked into her purse and found the Diazepam. She explains that it's just a leftover prescription, but Peter remarks that the bottle had last week's date and the prescribing doctor was Coop. So he spoke with Coop, who told him she has a drug dependency. Immediately, Lexi stands up, her body isn't the only thing that springs to attention, a couple of Sterling coins protruding from underneath her tight-fitting dress. Unable to hide her excitement, she tells Peter she doesn't need another doctor controlling her life. Too bad she's more upset at being called a user than for being the victim of a breach of confidentiality. She tells Peter she's going up to bed... alone. Before heading up the stairs, Lexi turns and adds, "In the future, kindly stay out of my life, and my business," but I think Peter already understood that going upstairs alone meant he wasn't going to get any "business" that night. [MP, the Complex]
Kyle flees from the confines of Taylor's abode, after crushing the velour on Taylor's sofa just a little bit more. Is it the effects of El Nino, or has Kyle joined the ranks of those with a loose screw or two? One thing's for certain, Taylor, freshly discarded by Peter and then Michael, is definitely a "loose screw," even by Melrose's standards! Kyle makes it back to his apt with Taylor clinging to him, telling him they were meant to be together; trying desperately to break down his resistance by suggesting another round of sex in an attempt to control him as much as those briefs she's wearing are controlling her tummy! Once inside his place, the phone rings, rescuing Kyle from those lips. It's Amanda on the other end, telling Kyle she can't sleep and figuring he'd like to know. He tells Amanda she's a user, then looks at Taylor and adds that everybody's a user. He slams the phone down as hard as he can, which means pressing the OFF button with all his might since he's using a cordless. Anyway, next he kicks Taylor out. Since letting her fingers do the walking didn't do the trick, Amanda decides to let her legs do the walking, and heads over to Kyle's, only to run into Taylor first. Taylor recommends Amanda not go up to see Kyle, saying the two of them had made quite a mess celebrating. Then Taylor mentions that there's a big party as part of the rebirth of the club and restaurant tomorrow night, and even if Kyle didn't invite her, she should come, since she had the most to do with their reopening. [Marina Condo]
The next morning Peter finds Lexi standing on the back patio and asks her if she slept well last night. She replies, "The bed was a little HARD." Lexi knows it wasn't the only thing hard last night, and her suspicions are confirmed when Peter adds, "I didn't sleep well either." Peter apologizing for his inept behavior is about as commonplace as a face slap on this show, and he does it again less than 10 minutes into the episode. He tells Lexi he won't poke his nose into her business (kinky, when you think about it) but only if she agrees to let him be her Svengali. She agrees, saying "You're my man, my doctor... and my employer." Lexi wants to get paid by Peter, but not in the same sense that Megan used to get paid for services rendered to Michael. Instead, Lexi wants to become an interior decorator, and has decided that Peter's condo be her first victim. [Beach House]
Ah, if there's one good thing that has come out of Michael's latest relationship, it's the fact that those putrid green bed sheets are gone, replaced as easily as they replace redheads. Megan wakes up, looking as though she's still in a coma. Michael rushes in, telling her she mustn't rush her recovery. He tells her to plan on several more months in bed, then runs to the kitchen to get the Pop Tart he baked for her. While in the kitchen, there's a knock at the door. I don't know what's worse: a doctor that refuses to make house visits, or one that insists on visiting unexpectedly before seven a.m.? Yes, you guessed it, Coop's the visitor and he wants to see Megan. Michael steps outside, keeping Coop out, telling him that Megan is not well enough to see him. Coop leaves, but promises Michael that he hasn't seen the last of him. [AWA]
Connie drops Amanda's office with some storyboards that a client in Seattle needs a few days from now. Amanda gasps a sigh of relief, telling Connie that she thought Sam had forgotten about them. Then Amanda comments that there's something about the storyboards that looks different. Maybe it's that ethereal quality that only a kindergartner could convey because that's what they look like. Connie admits that she touched them up a little. Amanda is impressed, but then again, she was impressed by Jack Parezi at one time in her life, too. When Amanda finds out that Connie is staying in town for awhile, Amanda comments that Sam chose the worst time to run off on a honeymoon and offers Connie a temp job, saying, "I have to find someone to run copies." Connie smiles and accepts the offer, saying "Copying is what I do best." I think what she meant to say was "Copulating," but we'll have to wait and see. [Hawaii]
Damn! I thought, when Connie mentioned Sam's honeymoon, that we'd be spared from seeing those two weenies for a week or two, but no luck. Instead, we are privy to what happens when you skimp on honeymoon accommodations. I'm not even sure it's Hawaii, because it would be just as easy to mistake this scene for a Kelbo's Polynesian restaurant. The bellhop insists it's Hawaii. But then again, who would trust a guy who says his name is Ray, while the name tag he's wearing says something else? Even though our newlywed couple got lei'ed at the airport, Sam takes one look at the bed and the two decide to start testing the springs... [Beach House]
Michael tucks Megan into bed for the evening, then starts to head to the living room, where he plans to sleep on the couch. Megan admits she's been getting used to him being by her side, and offers her bed for him to rest in. Michael quickly whips his robe off and hops in, eager to take Megan's temperature with his probe, but Megan stops him, saying she only wants to cuddle. [Upstairs Jazz Club]
Kyle is sitting at the bar, demanding another drink. Jennifer, the only bartender I've ever seen there, cuts him off after one, which is the M.O. for this joint, but then Kyle reminds her "who's the boss." So Jennifer unscrews the cap from the bottle and pours Kyle another McBride scotch (now I know how Kyle can afford to offer so many free drinks!) Jennifer moves over to attend to the only other patron at the bar, sitting at the opposite end, who just happens to be Coop. Even though Jennifer's big mouth is one of her best assets, it can also be one of her worst. When Coop displays his disgust in the medical board's backing of the Mancini Glove and how Michael's getting all the credit, Jennifer opens wide to say Michael deserves all the credit. Then she adds, she hopes there isn't a conflict of interest since Michael's chief-of-staff, and how it would be a shame if some yahoo with a grudge brought the company down with a lawsuit. When Coop hears this, his face starts to glow, and it's definitely not from the watered-down whiskey. Amanda arrives. Kyle goes to the stage to thank everybody for coming. He gives a special thanks to Amanda, saying "...there were nights she worked all night long... let's hear it for Amanda Woodward. The Queen of Give and Take, of Put Out and Take Some More. We are open tonight, because her motto is, Always Open. Enjoy the evening." [Beach House]
I'm not sure but I think Megan's purpose in this episode is to model pajamas, as we are graced with yet another ensemble. The two of them talk about something, but believe me when I say it'd be more interesting to describe the flowery pattern of the blankets. [MP, Billy & Sam's Apt]
Connie, apartment sitting for Billy and Sam, is keeping herself busy by drooling over photos of the wedding. Obviously, Billy not only skimped on the honeymoon accommodations but the photography too, opting for the 24-hour service at Sav-Ons Drugstore. For some reason, Sam decides to call Connie from Hawaii during the middle of her honeymoon. Connie tells Sam the news that she's got a temp job at Amanda Woodward Advertising. Sam smiles and immediately hangs up. She turns to Billy and says "Connie's life is on the rocks," I guess, referring to the fact Connie got a job at the same place as them. But Billy has other ideas in mind, and he utters the only Hawaiian he knows, "Kama nawa na lei u." His accent is atrocious, but Sam understands, and Billy proceeds to show her what they mean on the islands when they say, "The Big Kahuna!" [Upstairs Jazz Club]
Kyle has become a permanent fixture at the club's bar. But his arse is so numb from all the scotch that he doesn't even realize all the bar seats have been removed during the shutdown, and that all this time he's been sitting on the barstool shaft. Actually, none of the others sitting at the bar are complaining, after all, this *is* West Hollywood, where such a "seat" is more of a feature than a liability. Michael arrives, dragging Craig along with him. Michael is upset that Jennifer's stint as a bar maid, as he describes it, has caused the sales of the Mancini Glove to plummet. As CEO, he orders Jennifer to play this Field and have dinner to patch things up. [Marina Condo]
Peter and Lexi are together having dinner. Dionysus calls out to Lexi, "Red or white wine?" Lexi fails to answer, probably because she's unsure which goes better with Diazepam. Since she doesn't answer him, Peter heads over toward the bathroom, but stops short when he catches a glimpse of her fumbling around trying to pop a couple. [Wilshire Memorial]
Michael stops by to speak with Peter, who's covering for Dr. Shulman in Radiology for a couple of weeks. Michael asks how Megan's CAT scan looks, and Peter says she appears to be fine. Michael asks Peter to promise not to tell anyone, especially Megan, the news that she's fully recovered, claiming he's simply trying to salvage their relationship the only way men on Melrose know how. Peter understands, knowing that secrecy is always the best policy, and agrees to downplay Megan's recovery as long as Michael agrees to hire Lexi to remodel the Field/Mancini Enterprises office. Of course, Michael cannot let on that Peter is the one behind Lexi getting the remodeling stint. Lexi probably won't suspect anything anyway, even though the office space was done only two weeks earlier. Michael says the company can't pay, but Peter says Lexi would do it for free as long as she could use the office as a showcase. Life Lesson #1: Secrecy... strong enough for a man, but made for a woman. [AWA]
Connie drops off some more storyboards with Amanda. Amanda thinks they're perfect for the Seattle client, and can't believe Connie found the time to whip them up. Amanda groans that she's too busy to fly to Seattle to present the campaign herself. Connie suggests Amanda have Billy stop in Seattle on his way back from Hawaii. But Amanda, obviously flustered about the Kyle-Eric thing, comes up with a different idea. She says she needs Billy back in the office immediately, but that Sam -- someone who has had no advertising experience whatsoever, let alone art experience -- could fly to Seattle directly from Hawaii and present the ad to the clients. Connie makes the suggestion, "Give the girl the news, call her right now." Amanda, in a Stepford Wives moment, says, "I think I'll call her right now." She leaves the conference room and runs into Taylor roaming about in the hallway. Taylor lies to her by saying that Kyle would like Amanda to give up her share of the club, but that he's too upset to tell it to her face-to-face. Taylor adds that she would like to buy Amanda out. Amanda laughs, saying it would be a cold day in hell before she gave anything to Taylor. Taylor replies, "You already gave me Kyle." [Streets of West Hollywood]
Lexi and Peter are walking hand-in-hand. Lexi is telling Peter all about being called out of the blue to redecorate Field/Mancini Enterprises. Blah blah blah. Lexi has one last surprise for Peter. They stop and she points to a vacant retail space for lease. She tells Peter it's going to be her new Interior Design business. She'll probably name it "Lexi's." Life Lesson #2: It's easy to be successful in business. Just find some office space, and the rest will fall into place. [Kyle's the Restaurant]
Taylor tells Kyle that Amanda wants out of her share of the jazz club but just doesn't know how to tell him. I remember using this trick dozens of times on my parents without it working once, but somehow, Taylor pulls it off and Kyle believes her! Taylor mentions that the restaurant is doing so well (hey, it's already been open a whole day!) that she has the money to buy Amanda's share. Don't ask me, I'm as confused as the next guy. At first, Kyle can't stand to hear such ludicrousness, but when Taylor explains that they make good business partners, he agrees. [Kyle's the Restaurant]
Jennifer and Craig are spending more time arguing than they do eating their dinner. When Craig asks what Jennifer wants him to be, she says, "A lover, a partner, a friend." But before she can break out into a Rod Stewart medley, Craig interrupts her, saying, for a woman, it always comes down to marriage. Jennifer says she doesn't need the ring or a piece of paper, that she just wants a commitment. Craig says no-can-do, but makes her this offer instead: "Why don't we just sleep together when we're lonely, and try not to hurt each other." Jennifer, realizing this is the male's interpretation of commitment, takes it. [Beach House]
It's nighttime. Brett pays Megan an unscheduled visit while Michael is away at the hospital, letting himself in through the patio door. Coop tells Megan that Michael's been downplaying her recovery. He also tells her he's the one who sat by her side, whispered to her, held her hand, played her favorite music, eventually pulling her out of her coma. Megan refuses to believe him, saying Michael wouldn't lie about this. So Coop names some of her favorite music, and dares her to ask Michael the same question. Just then, Michael enters through the front door, and seeing Coop sitting next to Megan, asks "What are you doing here?" knowing Coop only makes morning visits. He kicks Coop out. Then Megan asks him if he knows what her favorite music is, and Michael answers, "Not yet sweetheart. But I'll make it my business to find out." [Hawaii]
Billy and Sam bid each other adieu, I mean aloha. Sam exclaims, "The honeymoon's overrrr." Billy bites his lip, knowing full well what that means... no more sex. She has to fly to Seattle to present her storyboards while Billy heads back to L.A. I'm not sure what Sam's wearing, but it's more hideous than her storyboards, if that's possible. [Field/Mancini Enterprises]
Lexi presents some of her interior design ideas, but Michael doesn't like the idea it'll cost money. Their heated debate is interrupted when Coop drops in. He tells them redecorating at this point is like arranging deck chairs on the Titanic. He tosses an envelope on the desk, informing them he's suing them for stealing his idea of the Mancini Glove. Michael reassures Jennifer and Craig that he did not steal the idea. Meanwhile, Lexi takes the attack personally, as if Coop was trying to ruin her first job. [MP, Billy & Sam's Apt]
Billy arrives and runs into Connie getting out of the shower. She smiles, dripping wet in more ways than one. Maybe sex isn't dead after the honeymoon. Billy jumps into the shower. Then the phone rings and Connie answers it. It's Sam calling. The two of them joke around, Connie asking, "Do you plan on keeping Billy barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen?" (I think Connie's got some problems). Sam corrects her, saying something like "Barefoot and bare-assed, all I can." Connie asks if Sam is calling to check up on Billy, asking if Sam's afraid he's cheating already, but Sam assures Connie that Billy isn't that type. Connie lies by telling Sam that Billy hasn't arrived home yet, but she'll have him call her tomorrow. [Beach House]
Jennifer pays Michael a visit to find out if Michael really stole the cauterizing glove idea. Michael assures her it was his idea, saying "Jennifer, you're family. I would never ever lie to you." Michael steps out for some air, although I think he left so that Jennifer wouldn't see his nose growing. Moments after he's gone, Megan pops out of the bedroom, modeling PJ outfit number four. She asks Jennifer if Coop played music for her in the hospital. Jennifer not only says yes, but opens that big mouth again (ooh) by adding that Coop had asked her to bring some of Megan's favorite CD's, and was very poetic when explaining the healing effects of music. Megan immediately calls Peter on his car phone and asks him if anyone kept a vigil by her side while she was unconscious. Peter answers "Coop." Megan hangs up and asks Jennifer to drive her back to Jennifer's apartment. Jennifer asks, "What about Michael?" Megan answers that she doesn't know Michael, and probably never has. [Marina Condo]
Lexi gets off the phone with Craig. The design of the glove company is on hold, pending litigation. Lexi is so upset, her Cindy Bradyitis rears its ugly head as she spouts, "Ith'nt it ironic? How Coopth's destwoiying my wife aw over again! What, duth he haf a vendetta againth me?" She runs to a drawer and reaches for her pill bottle, spilling the white tablets all over the carpet. Peter runs over to stop her, telling her she's an addict. He has ahold of her, but not for long as she proceeds to bite his hand, elbow him in the gut, then run off as fast as she can while wearing four inch heels and a tight dress. She runs out to his red Mercedes and tries to drive off, but Peter manages to jump into the passenger's seat. They race down the street, Lexi calling Peter a control freak. Suddenly, there's a loud thud. Lexi keeps driving while Peter continues his control tactics, ordering her to stop. She ignores him at first, but finally obeys. Peter gets out of the car and looks around in the darkened street, even though if they had hit something, it would have been much much farther back. Peter drives her back home, and Lexi stumbles back inside. Peter walks over to the front passenger-side quarter panel and notices something red on the headlight. He takes his hanky out and wipes it. Having four years of pre-med, four years of med school, four years of residency, and several more as staff member at Wilshire Memorial under his belt, Peter takes one look at the red substance and knows right away it isn't paint from his car. Finally, after several breathless moments, Peter concludes, "Blood." [To Be Continued...] Last Modified December 02, 1997 |
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