Melrose Place Drinking Game
[Episodes] [Chat Room] [Sights] [Sounds] [Fun & Games] [Headlines] [MP Links] [Contact Us] [Buy MP Stuff]

This version was originally plucked from the 'Net, but has been revised many times over, last updated on 05/31/99 (designated by ***). Please Note: Since the schedule for viewers outside of the U.S./Canada is delayed by varying degrees, some otherwise outdated rules are still listed. (Of course, even U.S./Canadian players can use the rules as they exist by merely popping in one of their old Melrose favorites and reliving the adventure. If you fall in this category, however, I recommend you seek professional help immediately, or at least after you sober up.)

Also, despite the occasional letter (pro and con) about the Brooke section, Iíve decided to keep all characters intact for the time being. Granted, many have departed, but there are those who like to have Melrose Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and occasional Melrose Weekends, playing old videotapes. Also, the rules are starting to get somewhat long (especially the Miscellaneous section), so you can either narrow the list yourself before the show starts, or wait for a trimmed-down version to appear as soon as I get over my weekly hangover! Cheers

 

Rules:

Just remember, if you drink and drive, be careful, or you could end up at Wilshire Memorial with the likes of Dr. Burns or Dr. Mancini taking care of you.
 

WARNING: Think twice before playing this game during any special two-hour episode!

Adding/Deleting a Rule:

Sometimes, usually during the hangover period, many a fan and Drinking Game player comes up with an idea for either a new rule or a modification/deletion of an existing rule. Well, weíre here to hear. If you have a suggestion, feel free to send it to us by filling out the Drinking Game Suggestion Box.

 

Pre-Game Warm-Up:

The S&M (for "Stand and Model", you perverts) segment. During the opening credits, members of the audience imitate the actors' shots. Audience drinks if the modeler pulls it off, modeler chugs if s/he just looks dorky. Audience chugs if someone can duplicate La Locklear's incredible double raising of a single eyebrow (seasons 2-4 credits only).

Characters are listed in alphabetical order.
 

Alison Parker (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)
Note: If you choose Alison, then you must drink only vodka -- no ice, no mixers (just like her!)

  1. Alison drinks something non-alcoholic - drink alcohol for her.
  2. Alison brushes her wispy hair from her face.
  3. Alison shifts her eyes when she's looking someone else in the face.
  4. Alison sticks out her lower jaw in disgust - 1 drink. An extra gulp if her tongue sticks out slightly between her teeth.
  5. Alison stares at the ground (deep in thought, no doubt).
  6. Alison says "I owe you one" - 2 drinks!
  7. Alison whispers a theory about something to Billy.
  8. Close-up of Alison's huge cheekbones.
  9. If Alison drinks, by all means drink with her!
  10. Alison gives in to Billy.
  11. Alison gasps her pathetic, whiny, "Ohhhh, Billy!!!" - entire bottle.
  12. Alison tries to convince Billy to be nice to Brooke.
  13. Alison tries to befriend another regular cast member, letting "bygones be bygones."
  14. Alison is seen wearing those horrible white "Keds" with her blue jeans.
  15. Alison is in bed with Jake kissing and hugging and Jane spots them. - 2 shots.
  16. Alison apologizes to someone - two drinks.
  17. Alison completes her dialog/scene without flicking/sticking out her tongue.
  18. Alison runs away from her problem instead of facing it.
  19. Alison lets the camera show the "coco-puff" on her cheek.
  20. Alison bites down on her lower lip in nervousness or pensiveness or whatever it is shes trying to convey so ever annoyingly...
  21. Alison takes a drink, after having just made a statement about how hard it is to quit.
  22. Alison is shown driving her Ford Escort -- 2 drinks.


Amanda Woodward

First shot of Amanda in power suit with hem above knee - 2 drinks if the suit is silver.

  1. Amanda shows up at someone's door to chew them out - Extra gulp if it's about the rent. Two extra gulps if it's about the rent and the person is in the middle of a tragedy or personal crisis.
  2. Amanda strides by the pool in a mini.
  3. Amanda says "How Dare You..." - 3 drinks.
  4. Amanda bleaches her hair to the roots - 2 if you can see the dark roots.
  5. Amanda seduces a new male character - 2 drinks if it's his first episode.
  6. Amanda looks bemused when someone criticizes her.
  7. Amanda uses alliteration in an insult (ex., "I'm not falling for your malicious, Machavellian machinations, Michael.") - 1 drink for each part (this example would require 4 drinks - 1 for each M).
  8. Amanda talks business during someone else's personal crisis .
  9. Any cast member confesses their love for Amanda - Give 4 drinks to the player of YOUR choice!
  10. You get a glimpse of Amanda's leopard spotted bed sheets!!
  11. Amanda admits that she is wrong - 2 drinks.
  12. A drink every time you spot the tattoo on Heather Locklear's ankle!
  13. Amanda wears a men's shirt as long as her knees as a night gown-10 drinks.
  14. Amanda uses her favorite line, "You're pathetic!"
  15. Amanda belittles Alison; two drinks if it's while in the D&D office.
  16. Amanda makes a smart-alek remark to Sydney - two drinks.
  17. Amanda greets someone as "You bastard" or "You bitch" - one drink; if someone greets her that way- two drinks.
  18. Amanda snubs Taylor's attempts to be her friend.
  19. Amanda has sex in her office - 2 drinks, 4 if it's on the desk.
  20. Amanda cancels social plans for work - 2 drinks if it's a honeymoon.
  21. Amanda switches allegiances in order to further her position at D&D (e.g., being on Craig's side but then switching to Arthur's side.)
  22. Amanda gets asked out for a drink - 1 drink; if she accepts - 2 drinks.
  23. Someone in the backround or in the regular cast checks out Amanda's derriere.
  24. Amanda punches someone over a man.
  25. Amanda wears something inappropriate to a business function (e.g., shirt revealing belly button to a business meeting).
  26. Amanda lets her "tell-tale bulge" show to the camera.
  27. Amanda is seen in more pantsuits than minis in a given episode - 1 shot.
  28. Amanda engages in battle with Taylor.
  29. Amanda begins her diatribe with "Look, ..."
  30. Amanda tells Jennifer she has an "attitude."
  31. Amanda looks to her side while she is talking to someone.
  32. Amanda is seen in a full body shot.  This only goes for season six because Heather Locklear is pregnant, so they aren't really showing many stomach shots of her.
     

 Billy Campbell (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Billy wears a horrible tie (voted on by viewers in the room) - 2 drinks.
  2. Billy looks dumbfounded (as if he's ready to say "Duhhhhh").
  3. Billy says, "Ah wuv eu, ______."
  4. Billy without a shirt - (2 drinks if you can count the ribs sticking out).
  5. Billy returning from playing soccer.
  6. Someone tells Billy he's co-dependent.
  7. Billy tells someone to tell the truth - 2 drinks if they actually do.
  8. Billy bails Alison out of a mess - 2 drinks if he tells her it's the last time he'll do it.
  9. Billy sees Brooke.
  10. Billy grins ala Corky from "Life Goes On," when he does something RIGHT.
  11. Billy belittles another cast member.
  12. Billy lisps Allison's name. (Allithon)
  13. Billy actually wears a belt! (re. his tendancy for jeans, terrible tie, tucked in shirt & no BELT) - big gulp.
  14. Billy passes out from his one or two beers.
  15. Billy proposes to Alison.
  16. Billy drops by the loft "just to apologize" to Samantha.
  17. Billy plays savior to a damsel in distress.
  18. Billy becomes perplexed, resulting in a patented dumb look.
  19. Billy buys new sneakers and gets rid of those ugly supermarket black and white chucks.
  20. Billy finds his main duty for a particular episode is to "toast" someone - 1 drink; if it's to Alison - 2 drinks.
  21. Billy gets rid of his Weird Al Yankovic haircut.
  22. Billy outwits someone-whole bottle!

 

Brett Cooper (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Brett is referred to as “Coop.”
  2. Brett makes cryptic reference to the woman he ”loved and lost."
  3. Brett plays Michael and Peter against each other.
  4. Brett is nagged by his ex-wife about his finances.
  5. Brett is threatened by his ex-wife.
  6. Brett threatens his ex-wife.
  7. Brett  makes a reference to Kimberly.
  8. Brett refers to his ex-wife as a "shrew."
  9. Brett  manages to get screwed over by Michael again.

 

Brooke Armstrong-Campbell (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Brooke says "Biiiiiiiiiilyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy".
  2. Brooke appears - 1 drink for every character that sees her.
  3. Brooke has more screen time than Matt - 1 drink for every scene extra
  4. Brooke's name comes up in conversation.
  5. Brooke widens those huge eyes and smirks when she gets her own way - entire bottle.
  6. Brooke takes a swim.
  7. Brooke says, “”I’m ovulating.”

 

Craig Field (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Craig reminds Amanda just how much power his father has and Amanda gives in as a result.
  2. Craig buys Samantha another gift; 2 drinks if she accepts.
  3. Craig tries to convince Amanda that he's the only one for her. Craig is seen at D&D without his coffee cup in hand.
  4. Craig actually does some work at the advertising agency (D&D or Sky High) - 4 drinks.
  5. Craig's attempts at seducing Sydney result in a kiss... or more.
  6. Craig's residence is shown.
  7. Craig does a worse acting job than Billy at crying.
  8. Craig refers to Billy as “Campbell.”
  9. Craig gets drunk and feels sorry for himself.

 

Jake Hanson (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Jake roughin' someone up, or gettin' roughed up - 1 per punch, 2 if he flings 'em against a wall or bar, 3 if he grabs 'em by the collar.
  2. Jake flees the scene.
  3. Jake without a shirt - Extra gulp if he's carrying tools.
  4. Jake has money problems - 2 drinks if Jo offers to lend him money.
  5. Jake can't seem to make a decision.
  6. Jake hops on his bike to avoid resolving a conflict - 2 drinks.
  7. Jake kisses someone besides his girlfriend - extra drink if he gets caught.
  8. Jake gives one of the main characters a free drink.
  9. Jake gives free advice while bartending.
  10. Jake gives one of the main characters a job a Shooters.
  11. One drink for every time Jake gets angry at his girlfriend yet, in a fit of jealousy/rage/stupidity, ends up having sex with her on his desk at Shooters.
  12. Jake does not get a woman during the entire show.
  13. Jake says, "I don't want to get involved." - 10 drinks; down the entire bottle if Jake has sex in the same episode.
  14. Jake is in a room with a female character he has yet to sleep with.
  15. Jake is in bed with Alison kissing and hugging and Jane spots them. - 2 shots.
  16. Jake and his current interest go to the back room at Shooters to "talk in private" but end up doing something else instead.
  17. Jake gets the trusty old bottle out to drown his sorrows rather than deal with the situation like a man.

 

Jane Mancini (She’s back for Season 7!)

  1. Jane gives a dirty look - 2 if it's a result of her boyfriend.
  2. Jane is once again in need of a visit from the Fashion Police.
  3. Jane swears.
  4. Jane makes a poor business decision - 2 if she signs the contract.
  5. Jane makes a bad decision about who to get involved with.
  6. Jane gives in to Sydney.
  7. Jane sleeps with Michael.
  8. Jane sleeps with Richard.
  9. Jane sells some of her designs.
  10. Jane has a temper tantrum or tries to get Richard fired - 4 drinks and 2 shots.
  11. Jane pronounces the word design as "DEE-zine".
  12. Jane gets pulled aside by Sydney (outside or to another room) in order for privacy from Sam.
  13. Jane starts another business with seemingly no start-up money - two drinks.
  14. Jane lets some hunky new guy ruin her career and make a fool of her again - drink the bottle.
  15. Jane actually rings up a sale at the boutique--guzzle the entire bottle.
  16. Jane spots Alison and Jake in bed, kissing, etc. - 2 shots.
  17. Jane attempts to ruin someone else's relationship out of spite (e.g., Billy and Sam, Alison and Jake, etc.) - 1 shot.
  18. Jane's hair reaches below her ears.
  19. Jane preparing and/or drinking coffee - 1 drink. Five drinks for any episode that doesn't feature this. (not too likely).

 

Jennifer Mancini (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Jennifer sucks in her cheekbones or smiles snidely after a confrontation with Amanda.
  2. Jennifer out-insults Amanda.
  3. Jennifer lies to Megan.
  4. Jennifer adjusts her cleavage - 3 drinks for each adjustment.
  5. Jennifer crosses her arms and walks away pouting.
  6. Jennifer has sex - a case of Andre champagne.
  7. More than 1 inch of Jennifer's gums show when she smiles- 1 drink.
  8. Jennifer actually appears to be wearing a bra - 4 drinks! (Only 1 drink if she's topless except for the bra).

 

Jo Reynolds (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Jo whines - extra gulp if she runs fingers through hair while whining.
  2. Jo talks above a whisper.
  3. Jo gets a new car - drinks are on Jo.
  4. Jo steals someone else's boyfriend.
  5. Jo tries to help a friend and it backfires.
  6. Jo "breaks up" with her current boyfriend - 2 drinks if they get back together by the end of the episode
  7. Someone tells Jo to "stay put" or "stay in the car" - 2 drinks if she actually stays.
  8. Jo makes squinty eyes at someone to show how angry she is - 2 drinks.
  9. Jo sticks her nose in someone else's business.
  10. Jo not only asks someone for advice, but actually follows it! - 2 drinks.
  11. Jo is in a scene actually using a camera.
  12. One shot for every time Jo threatens to move back to New York. Two if she gets an airplane ticket.
  13. Jo mentions the son she gave up for adoption.
  14. Jo's name is mentioned now that she's gone to Bosnia.
  15. Jo loses her voice in a squeeky hysterical scream or cry for help.

 

Kimberly Shaw (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Kimberly threatens someone.
  2. Kimberly uses medical lingo.
  3. Kimberly lies.
  4. Kimberly tries to kill someone - (1 per character).
  5. Kimberly's alter personality shows up.
  6. Kimberly wears a hospital gown.
  7. Kimberly has a patient other than a main character.
  8. One drink for each of Kimberly's other personalities showing up.
  9. Kim ditches her medication: - 3 drinks.
  10. Some one touches Kimberly's wig (even if it's Kimberly herself) - 2 drinks.
  11. A close up of Kimberly's face, 3 if it really spooks you.
  12. One drink if Kimberly's alter personality attempts to kill someone, two drinks if it's Michael.
  13. Every time she tells one of her personalities that they won't win.
  14. Whenever Kimberly rolls away from Michael (clutching pillow is optional) denying him sex--three drinks.
  15. Kimberly tells Michael, "My therapist advised..." as an excuse for not having sex.
  16. Kimberly attempts a sex change opertaion - 10 drinks.
  17. Kimberly tells Megan she can have Michael.
  18. Kimberly attempts but fails a suicide attempt - 1 drink; if she's successful - 3 bottles! (Hey, either way, you win!)
  19. Kimberly has sex with Michael and gets caught by Megan; if she gets away with it, 2 drinks!
  20. Kimberly massages her temples to relieve pain induced from either her tumor or original head injury.
  21. Kimberly shakes her tumor-ridden head and flicks her hair back.
  22. Kimberly's brain tumor disappears...then reappears again (a wonder to modern medicine!) - two drinks.
  23. Kimberly finally dies - finish the bottle.
  24. Kimberly is mentioned after her (second) death - one drink. Two drinks if it is hinted that she was criminally insane.

 

Kyle McBride

  1. Kyle's hair appears to be in desperate need of a comb - 1 drink; five drinks if he appears in the same room with a comb!
  2. Kyle's wife, Taylor, lies to him.
  3. Kyle "gives in" to Taylor.
  4. Kyle says to Taylor that he thinks there is another reason why she wanted to come to California.
  5. Kyle asks Taylor how long she will blame him for his affair. Two drinks if she kisses him to reassure him.
  6. Kyle saunters into a room wearing a spotless chef outfit--two drinks.
  7. Kyle is reminded about "what happened before" by Taylor, or promises her, "We're moving on, this is a clean slate."
  8. Kyle gives Sid a taste of something he is cooking - 1 drink; two drinks if he sticks the utensil back in the pot (YUK! Where's the Board of Health??)
  9. Kyle makes a reference to being in the Marines.
  10. Kyle and Syd are alone - take 2 drinks - if alone in the kitchen of the restaurant - drink whole bottle
  11. Kyle gets in a fight - one drink for each punch.
  12. Kyle refuses to servce someone/kicks someone out of Upstairs/Kyle's.
  13. Kyle actually figures out when Taylor is lying to him-3 drinks!
  14. Kyle laughs at the end of a scene, showing his enormous teeth.
  15. Thinks something is suspicious.
  16. Gets jealous of Peter.
  17. Plays basketball with Ryan - 1 drink. A whole bottle if he makes a basket!
  18. Kyle drives somewhere completely loaded on booze and/or pills without getting pulled over or getting in an accident.***

 

Lexi Sterling

  1. Lexi brings up the subject of the divorce settlement with her ex-husband.
  2. Lexi threatens Coop.
  3. Lexi sneaks into another room to take Scooby Snacks.
  4. calls Amanda a bitch.
  5. Calls Peter a bastard.
  6. Tells another woman to stay away from Peter.
  7. Has sex to get information - 1 drink, 2 if she leaves as soon as she gets the information.
  8. Doesn't have sex in an episode - 2 drinks
  9. Lexi removes all her clothing in one large motion.***
  10. Lexi makes a sexual double-entendre (example: "I had to throw Peter back. He was too small")***
  11. Lexi makes a sexual comment so blunt you wonder how it slipped by the censors - 2 drinks.***

 

Matt Fielding (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Matt has a line of dialog.
  2. Matt's character is used in a gay context.
  3. Matt's character is used for a token appearance only - and if his only shot in the whole show was in the opening credits - 4 drinks.
  4. Matt has a steady relationship - 2 drinks, plus a shot!
  5. Matt's bangs brush his eyes.
  6. Matt cries.
  7. FOX actually shows Matt kissing another guy (or vice versa) - Give yourself 10 drinks on this one, babe!
  8. Matt mentions being a medical student.
  9. Matt without a shirt - 4 drinks.
  10. If a guy gets dressed in Matt's apartment - 5 drinks.
  11. If Matt and a guy are actually shown in Matt's bedroom - drink the whole bottle, and order a case in preparation for possible kissing scene!
  12. Matt wears his stethescope sideways around his neck.
  13. Matt's love interest is afraid to admit being gay -- extra drink if this pisses off Matt.
  14. Matt bats his eyelashes and looks demure.
  15. Any scene when Matt is actually studying--slam your entire drink.
  16. Matt blinks his bulging eyes furiously, completely perplexed at anyone's comment - 1 drink, 2 if he stutters a response.
  17. Matt has a storyline that has nothing to do with the fact that he's homosexual.
  18. Matt indulges in his drug habit.
  19. Matt meets a woman and changes his sexual preference - 5 bottles.
  20. Matt meets someone at the hospital who is NOT gay.
  21. Matt gets beat up or decked by anybody.
  22. Matt deviates from his usual, boring, moral goody-goody self - 1 bottle.
  23. Matt wears a pink shirt.

 

Megan Lewis-Mancini

  1. Megan is expressionless about anything. (A half-shot, otherwise you'd be drunk by her first scene)
  2. Megan says, "Michael, I love you."
  3. Megan pretends to care about Kimberly.
  4. Megan is reminded of her days of prostitution by either an incident or another character.
  5. Megan cheats on Michael.
  6. Megan is seen talking to someone other than Michael or Kimberly.
  7. Megan lasts an entire episode without crying in any of her scenes - two shots.
  8. Megan is seen with a Sydney-type ugly barrette.
  9. Megan sides with Jennifer Mancini rather than Michael.
  10. Megan turns Michael down for sex
  11. Megan doesn't look cross-eyed - 2 drinks.
  12. Megan is abused or otherwise taken advantage of by a man.
  13. Megan rejects Ryan’s advances.

 

Michael Mancini

  1. Michael dreams up some evil plan.
  2. Michael uses medical lingo - 2 drinks.
  3. Michael threatens someone.
  4. Michael without a shirt.
  5. Michael tells a lie - if he's smirking, drink 2.
  6. You see Michael's "you-know-what"-eating grin.
  7. Michael tells the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help him God - down the whole bottle!
  8. Michael says he's a nice guy.
  9. Michael looks like he's serious - if he's believable, drink 2.
  10. Michael gives in to Sydney.
  11. Michael lets his small head think for him rather than his other head.
  12. Michael remarries.
  13. Michael puts on his pretty puppy-dog face to one of his old flames.
  14. Someone moves in or out of the beachhouse.
  15. Michael refuses an attractive woman's offer for sex, and doesn't change his mind for the whole episode.
  16. Michael calls out the wrong girl's name while having sex.
  17. Michael stoops to "doing the nasty" with Taylor.
  18. Anytime more than 2 of michael's (ex-) wives are in a scene at the same.
  19. Michael successfully blackmailís another main character.
  20. Michael utters those three words, “Chief of Staff," in succession - 1 drink. Two drinks if anyone other than Michael or Peter mentions that all too temporary job.
  21. Michael gets caught with his pants down - 1 drink, two, if it's his current wife that catches him.
  22. Michael says he's an honest guy.
  23. Michael resists a woman's advances for an entire scene rather than caving in after five seconds - 2 drinks.
  24. Each time Michael goes to couples therapy.
  25. Michael heals a woman he has been sleeping with.

 

Peter Burns
 (As an additional requirement, whenever you drink, you drink only Scotch, Peter's favorite drink!)

  1. The Doc is in cahoots with a cast member for some evil plan - 2 drinks.
  2. The Doc almost kills someone.
  3. The Doc does kill someone - 4 drinks.
  4. The Doc does something nice for someone.
  5. The Doc on the golf course - 2 drinks.
  6. The Doc has a patient other than a regular cast member.
  7. The Doc smirks while saying how seriously sincere he is.
  8. The Doc writes a prescription.
  9. The Doc gives in to Sydney.
  10. The Doc confesses his love for Amanda - 1 drink; extra gulp if he says "I love you, Amanda" verbatim.
  11. The Doc gets accused of doing something he didn't do.
  12. The Doc does something for himself that doesn't involve Amanda.
  13. The Doc gets Amanda to come back to him and something happens to send her away.
  14. The Doc blows off Taylor.
  15. The Doc kisses Taylor, two drinks if it leads to sex.
  16. The Doc begins by telling Taylor they shouldn't see each other anymore, two drinks if they end up having sex.
  17. The Doc calls Taylor "Beth."
  18. The Doc gets arrested - half shot of Jack Daniels.
  19. The Doc utters those three words, “Chief of Staff," in succession - 1 drink. Two drinks if anyone other than Michael or The Doc mentions that all too temporary job.
  20. The Doc threatens Michael with grevious bodily harm - 1 drink. Two drinks if The Doc actually inflicts grevious bodily harm on Michael- 2 drinks.

Ryan McBride (Melrose “Virgin” introduced in Season 7)

  1. Every time he starts a sentence with “Well...” or “Uhh...” - 1 gulp.
  2. Plays basketball with Kyle - 1 drink. If he actually makes a basket - 1 bottle!!
  3. Asks Megan on a date.
  4. Ryan sleeps with someone he is not dating, then appears to have completely forgotten about it by the next time he appears on screen.***

 

Samantha Reilly (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Samantha "brown noses" Jane in order to gain favor.
  2. Samantha delivers one of her pity-me stories and someone falls for it.
  3. Samantha appears at the same time as some evidence regarding Richard's burial.
  4. Samantha is left alone because Syd and Jane scurry away to talk behind her back.
  5. Samantha refers to her Maryland roots.
  6. Samantha delivers a quick one-liner "a la Sandra Bullock" style--two drinks.
  7. Samantha actually rings up a sale at the boutique--guzzle the entire bottle.
  8. Samantha turns in her candy-cane outfit for a belly shirt job at D&D - 3 drinks.
  9. Samantha actually says "No" to her dad's requests for more money.
  10. Samantha decides honesty is the best policy.
  11. One of Samantha's hideous paintings is shown or otherwise referred to. Extra drink if someone intimates that she has "talent."

 

Sydney Andrews (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Sydney pleads with Jane for help, swearing that she's changed - Extra gulp if Jane slams the door in Sydney's face.
  2. Sydney screws everything up.
  3. Sydney wears a dress that is not from the 1960's or 1970's.
  4. Someone calls Sydney a whore.
  5. Sydney acts like a whore.
  6. Sydney threatens someone.
  7. Sydney sleeps with Jane's boyfriend.
  8. Sydney files her fingernails.
  9. Sydney finally has sex - 5 drinks.
  10. Sydney answers a phone at Burns & Mancini - 4 drinks!
  11. Sydney delivers one of her patented harsh one liners.
  12. Sydney wears the same outfit even though a day or two has passed for other characters - 2 drinks.
  13. Sydney's bow matches her outfit exactly.
  14. Sydney wears something remotely attractive.
  15. Sydney and her use of extortion/blackmail: To general character - 1 drink; to Michael - 2 drinks; to Jane - 3 drinks. Double that if she succeeds.
  16. Sydney pulls Jane aside (outside or another room) in order for privacy from Sam.
  17. Sydney actually goes to work - 2 drinks.
  18. Sydney wears shoes which actually seem practical for the situation she's in (e.g., not wearing high-heeled boots while hiking through the wilderness).
  19. Sydney actually rings up a sale at the boutique--guzzle the entire bottle.
  20. Sydney and Kyle are alone - take 2 drinks - if alone in the kitchen of the restaurant - drink whole bottle.
  21. You find yourself thinking "poor sydney" - one drink; if jane is in the scene - two drinks.
  22. Sydney actually gets more than 5 minutes of Carter's time -- 1 drink; Carter has enough time to make it with Sydney -- 2 drinks.
  23. Sydney gets through one episode without wearing something purple, flowery, or puke green - guzzle one bottle.
  24. Sydney buys some decent furniture.
  25. Sydney is shown driving her crappy brown Chevette--3 drinks.

 

Taylor McBride (For E! Channel Repeats, videotaped episodes, or international schedules ONLY!)

  1. Taylor pouts or licks her collagen-injected lips.
  2. Taylor actually attempts to deliver her line with a Boston accent!
  3. Taylor thinks hopelessly about Peter. Add two drinks if she then pulls out the newspaper article with him on the front page.
  4. Taylor calls Kyle, "baby".
  5. Taylor and Peter kiss. Five drinks if Kyle sees them.
  6. Taylor pursuades Kyle to have sex to avoid an issue--three drinks.
  7. Taylor is seen without lip gloss.
  8. Taylor reminds Kyle about "what happened before" (his affair).
  9. Taylor butts into Amanda's business (or pisses her off).
  10. Taylor flirts with Peter - 2 drinks if she flirts with him in front of Amanda - 3 drinks if Peter remains oblivious to her advances.
  11. Taylor goes the entire episode without revealing her secret - 5 drinks.
  12. Taylor doesn't show up for work - 2 drinks if Sydney just happens by and fills in for her.
  13. Another character comments on Taylor's lips - 3 drinks.
  14. Taylor grunts like an animal at the end of an episode or gets a feral, predatory look in her eye.
  15. Taylor looks as though she's actually combed/brushed/cut her hair!
  16. Taylor is wearing skin-tight spandex pants or velour pants suit - 3 drinks.
  17. Taylor makes an ugly face.
  18. Taylor plants those collagen injected lips on anyone.
  19. Taylor is seen with overly accentuated dark lipliner
  20. Taylor acts like her dead sister, Beth.
  21. Taylor beats herself silly.
  22. Taylor plays with her lips or sticks her thumb nail between her teeth - 2 drinks.
  23. Taylor wears a black bra under a white shirt.
  24. Taylor wears a dress that could NOT double as lingerie-3 drinks.
  25. Taylor asks anybody if they would like to “feel my baby."
  26. A woman punches Taylor in the face after she has stolen their man.
  27. Taylor holds onto the same man for more than 4 episodes.

 

Special Guest Stars (excluding Heather Locklear)

  1. Special Guest star (surprise, surprise) can't act! - 3 drinks.
  2. Special Guest star dies after 4 episodes - 2 drinks.
  3. Special Guest star stays after 4 episodes - 4 drinks (plus one for each additional episode).
  4. Special Guest star has good looks, but no talent.
  5. Special Guest star destroys someone's life, career or future - 2 drinks.
  6. Special Guest star becomes a cast member - 3 chugs.
  7. Special Guest star appears to lure viewers to watch a spin-off.
  8. Special Guest star is a "has-been" trying to save their acting career.
  9. Special Guest star returns after being off the show for a while (example, if Tracy Lords returns)
  10. Special Guest star gives in to Sydney - 2 drinks.
  11. Special Guest star offers home for a party out of the goodness of their heart.
  12. Special guest star turns out to be simply an overrated has-been actor persona (example: Julie Newmar).
  13. A child star makes a guest appearance (Example: Mara Wilson).
  14. Special Guest star was an actress/actor from another Spelling show (e.g., Models Inc., Savannah, Pacific Palisades, 90210, etc).

 

Miscellaneous (For the truly adventuresome!)

  1. Main character experiences a "dream sequence."
  2. All the main characters in the same scene - 2 if it's away from 4616.
  3. Anybody throws something breakable (or something that breaks another object) - 2 drinks.
  4. Any couple "under the sheets," 3 drinks if they play wailing guitar music.
  5. Slow-motion pre-commercial flashback - 1 drink per.
  6. Somebody in the pool - 1 drink per character, 2 drinks if they drown.
  7. Bra strap showing.
  8. Viewer's prophecy fulfilled - 2 drinks to the person who guessed correctly.
  9. Cliche' use (ex: when Jane said "you give him an inch, he'll take a kilometer") - 2 drinks if it is altered.
  10. Historical or political reference.
  11. Laughter generated by actual humor on the show - 3 drinks to the person who laughed.
  12. Profanity, such as "hell" in any context - 1 drink per word (2 if uttered by Amanda).
  13. Any of the main characters kiss each other.
  14. Someone tells a main character to seek professional counseling.
  15. Anybody messes with their hair.
  16. Somebody threatens Sydney.
  17. Somebody actually believes something Sydney says - 2 drinks.
  18. Something important to a character is destroyed (ex. Jake's Bar, Jane's designs, etc.)
  19. Somebody's past comes back to haunt them - 2 drinks (4 if it is a plot element that we never knew about, such as a brother, ex-husband or wife, adoption or evil twin!).
  20. Opening scene begins with either the Jogger Lady with dog running by MP sign, Pool Boy cleaning the already sparkling pool, the two guys on bicycles pedalling by, camera zooms in on front of building - 1 drink for each that occurs.
  21. Anybody becomes the victim of a "One Night Stand".
  22. Pool Boy or Leaf-Blowing Boy in segue way shot 0 1 drink for Pool Boy, 2 drinks for Leaf-Blowing Boy.
  23. Main character playing pool - 1 per character.
  24. Computer interface that calls up desired data with a single keystroke or mouse click.
  25. Main character betrays confidence of another (ex., Billy and Alison telling about Amanda's illness).
  26. Parallel to Beverly Hills, 90210, Central Park West or Savannah.
  27. Technical or editing error (ex., microphone visible).
  28. Somebody tells a main character "I'm on your side".
  29. Main character saves someone's life - 2 if it's another main character.
  30. Someone is injured in a car crash or other major accident.
  31. Main character is actually working at their job (ex., Jo taking photos, Jake making a drink, Jane drawing a design).
  32. A patient, other than Kimberly, shows up for an appointment at the Burns-Mancini medical office.
  33. There is a believable twist in the plot - 2 drinks.
  34. Someone wears a shiny silver article of clothing - 2 drinks.
  35. Richard packing/unpacking boxes - 1 drink for each box visible.
  36. Main character getting outta da shower.
  37. A main character visits a bar other than "Shooters" or a restaurant other than "Kyle's."
  38. A door slams - 3 drinks.
  39. Main character gets arrested - 2 drinks.
  40. Main character shows up with a new haircut; 2 drinks for more than one hair length change in one episode.
  41. Main character dies - 10 drinks.
  42. Main character witnesses their lover being intimate with someone ELSE -- extra drink if spotted through a window.
  43. Anyone says "Go to Hell" (apparently the most extreme expletive allowable on network TV).
  44. Any subplot involving a child.
  45. If a MP character appears in a made-for-TV movie during that same week, one drink for every appearance during MP of that character -- extra drink if the made-for-TV movie also appears on FOX.
  46. Any meeting in the (apparently only) conference room at D&D Advertising -- extra drink if two characters have sex anywhere at D&D -- extra extra drink if the venetian blinds are "cleverly" rotated closed prior to this sex.
  47. New, previously untried love combinations occur between main characters (e.g. Jake and Allison, Jo and Billy, Amanda and Matt, Michael and Matt).
  48. Any character drugs another character.
  49. Main character gets put in jail or blamed for something they didn't do.
  50. Any main character makes a major career change with no loss/gain in wages.
  51. Any answering machine cameo.
  52. Any pair of main characters talks about getting married - 1 drink; 2 drinks if they actually do!
  53. Every time the Melrose Place "tiles" appear (the ones by the exterior of the apartment gates).
  54. A character makes a reference to Alison being in AA.
  55. The ambulance pulls up to the circular drive at Wilshire Memorial - 1 drink; if you can hear the siren - 2 drinks; if there is the possibility of a main character being in the ambulance - 3 drinks.
  56. A scene from D&D does NOT start with the sign that says "D&D, Wilshire Courtyard" or a scene from Wilshire Memorial does NOT start with the sign that says "Wilshire Memorial Hospital" - 3 drinks.
  57. People spotting: Outside of D&D, if you spot the woman in the electric wheelchair and the guy walking next to her - 1 drink for each one you spot.
  58. More people spotting: Every time one sees the two nurses leaving Wilshire Memorial.
  59. Someone has sex with a main character AND his/her sibling. For example, Michael having slept with Jane and then sister Sydney; Jo doing both Jake and Jes; Amanda taking on the Parezi brothers; etc.).
  60. Any character who returns after at least a season long absence - 4 drinks.
  61. Someone survives a huge fall because they landed on someone and that someone dies.
  62. Someone shown on the show that is definitely bigger than a size 4.
  63. The word "sex" is mentioned - "six" gulps.
  64. Any dead lover's name is mentioned (ex: The Parezi boys, Haley, Brooke, Jess, Reed, Mackenzie, et al.).
  65. The words "wacko", "psycho", or "lunatic" is used.
  66. Someone comes back from the dead.
  67. Someone actually gets and stays married! - 1 bottle of champagne.
  68. Someone ACTUALLY is shown sans makeup and wearing sweatpants!
  69. Somone actually does something "good."
  70. Everytime someone checks their mail: 1 shot if it is good news, 2 shots if it is bad news.
  71. You spot the woman in the opening credits wearing jeans with holes in them.
  72. Car damage occurs to any of the main characters.
  73. Every time "STAT to physical therapy" is heard over the PA system at Wilshire Memorial - 1 shot.
  74. If a main character orders a drink in Shooters, down one with them.
  75. Someone miraculously recovers from a debilitating condition or life-threatening illness (such as Amanda's recovery from leukemia, Alison's miraculous regaining of sight, Jane's bounce back from paralysis, Kimberly's triumphs over mental illness): one drink for every episode it took for the recovery.
  76. A main character moves out of the building - 1 drink; when they move back in - 2 drinkgs; if they move in to former tenant's apartment and another character makes a reference to this - 3 drinks.
  77. If you spot an actor's or actress' flesh-colored body suit underneath the sheets during a love/sex scene (Marcia Cross is famous for this).
  78. A character peers through the blinds just in time to eavesdrop on someone else's conversation.
  79. Anytime any couple either slaps or punches or hits the other in some way (Matt and his boyfriend have made this popular!!)
  80. A main character gets pregnant.
  81. Main character violently sweeps everything off the top of a desk, bar, table, etc, in order to pin someone down and have sex with them.
  82. Something explodes - Two drinks if Kimberly's around - Three drinks if a non-main character is killed!
  83. Someone at D&D switches offices.
  84. Celebrate each wedding by taking three gulps every few seconds for 10 seconds.
  85. Every time you find yourself saying "This is dumb, I'm turning it off at the next ad"- two drinks.
  86. Someone actually does some housework, laundry, ironing.
  87. A pregnant character actually has a baby - 2 bottles (as this is so highly unlikely)
  88. Main character is seen actually eating or drinking something at Kyle's or Shooter's.
  89. Two main characters in the same scene wearing different seasonal clothing (e.g., Amanda in a velvet suit speaking to Sydney in a sundress).
  90. Two main characters switch hairdos (e.g., Peter and Jake).
  91. A former main character is mentioned - 3 drinks.
  92. A main character tells another to "rot in Hell!"
  93. Every time you say to yourself, “This is the most vile, disgusting, filthy form of entertainment I've ever subjected myself to," take a sip (otherwise you might be drunk after the first scene).
  94. Everytime someone says BITCH in ANY context on the show....the house buys a shot of tequila for all who play!!!!
  95. Every time a main character is driving a convertible--1 drink.
  96. Any cast member: Wears something brown - in homage to Jane's memorable line "It came to be as an epiphany - brown is the new black!"
  97. Any character tells someone else to "Stay away from my husband/wife!"

 

Everyone Plays the following:

Commercial breaks

  1. Feminine hygiene product - 1 drink for every guy in the room.
  2. Beverly Hills 90210 promo is shown.
  3. FOX Under the Helmet.
  4. FOX Cold Hard Facts.
  5. FOX Safe At Home.
  6. You turn on the TV late and miss the words "Previously... on Melrose Place"
  7. You find yourself humming along with the theme song - 1 slap.
  8. Pacific Palisades promo is shown.
  9. An Ally McBeal commercial airs during a given episode, showing former MP star, Courtney Thorne-Smith.

 

BONUS ROUND: Scenes from next week's episode

  1. Threat of a major character dying - 2 drinks (1 drink if minor).
  2. An old character comes back - 2 drinks if they were supposed to be dead.
  3. A bra strap shows.
  4. SEX - 2 drinks.
  5. Face slap.
  6. Any character hospitalized, committed, or imprisoned.
  7. Clip from coming attraction ruins a previous cliff-hanger.
  8. There is NO coming attraction for the very next week, due to being preempted by another special.

 

Acknowledgements: This master list could not have been compiled without the creative imaginations of the fans of MP scattered throughout the world. Suggestions have been edited for space and to eliminate redundancy and possible alcoholism.

 

 Last Modified May 31, 1999

[Episodes] [Chat Room] [Sights] [Sounds] [Fun & Games] [Headlines] [MP Links] [Contact Us] [Buy MP Stuff]
tramadol hydrochloride ultram lowest price 300ct side effects of valium viagra discount online vicodin addition effects
buy loss online com phentermine prescription viagra weight com online tramadol ultram express buy valium c o d free viagra pen